How often do you have someone ask about you? The ‘how are you’, ‘how are things going’ or ‘how have you been’ ?
Every day? Or every second? I think it is a pretty usual part of life. From family, friends, coworkers and sometimes even strangers. Another way in which we can connect and share with others.
Are you ready for my next question? Here it is …
Do you answer honestly? You don’t have to spill to every single person who greets you in a day, BUT to your people – the ones you want to know about, support and celebrate life with – how do you reply?
I have been holding onto this thought for a while now this year. Mostly because I found myself to be answering automatically and quickly. As if I was on some kind of auto pilot, or like I didn’t want to ‘bother’ people.
How ridiculous, especially if these are people who love and care for you – they most likely want to know that you feel sad, low, angry, happy, ecstatic or balanced.
I found myself using three words often…
* Alright * Ok * Fine *
They are not feelings, they are noncommittal words that brush the question or person away. I’m trying really hard lately to avoid these words staying in my everyday vocabulary.
It is perfectly acceptable to say how you feel. I hope you know that, or learn it. As I have learnt.
Watch out for the repeated use of those three words.. they can trigger that maybe something just isn’t OK.
KOOKLAH ‘a living doll, living a life not yet imagined..’ XO
.:.:.:. KOOKLAH .:.:.:.
Editor: I hope you enjoy this guest post from Sarah as much as I have, I look forward to your feedback.
These words have been a bit of a mantra of mine of late.
I am running late for a doctors appointment, and traffic is a nightmare. But, it is all okay, because I am exactly where I need to be. Everything is as it should be.
This acceptance that the world is perfect just as it is, is a lovely realisation to come too. The world is perfect in its imperfections. And you are too!
This realisation is a step towards a greater acceptance that I need to come to. I need to accept the autism in my life, that my children are exactly as they are meant to be. I am not there yet. I am not willing to let go of the possibility that I can somehow ‘improve’ them. They need to be better in order to function as adults, and I want this so much for them.
As I said, it is a step forward. A small step, but forward.
I believe that it is easier to start on the inconsequential. If I can accept that we have ran out of coconut flakes, then surely, eventually, I can accept that my pain won’t ever go away. If I can talk myself out of the stress of traffic standing still on the freeway, then there is hope that one day I will accept I was not invited to the wedding of someone who I thought of as a good friend.
Acceptance is tied up with forgiveness. Both are hard. But start small and eventually we’ll get there.
Try to remind yourself that everything is just as it should be and let me know how you go.
For my fortnightly guest post for Sarah at Creating Contentment I shared something I learnt in the last two weeks, how clutter can affect our state of mind. Find an excerpt below, then click the link to head over to Sarah’s blog to read the rest… Don’t forget to let me know what you think! Kooklah Xo
It was during this week, as I was coming and going from work, with a few piles of belongings I was sorting through and some deconstructed furniture lying around that I felt really low… I found the clutter only added to my frustration, it made me feel dragged down and overloaded.
I have come to realise that our mental state is very much influenced by the area in which we spend the most amount of time. This realisation is fantastic and such a positive step in my journey.
Happy mind, happy life.
For the rest, click the link at the top of the post. Have a brilliant day…